Ahoy! Welcome aboard the S.S. Scoops Ahoy. Prepare for choppy waters.
You've just been hired for the sweetest summer job in Hawkins, Indiana. This is your official employee uniform. It’s for the dads who appreciate nautical puns, navigating the treacherous social seas of the mall, and maybe uncovering a secret Russian base hidden beneath it all. This isn't just a t-shirt; it's a statement. You sling ice cream, you look good doing it, and you're probably way cooler than your kids think you are. Dingus.
Woven from 100% combed and ring-spun cotton, this tee is more comfortable than hiding in an air duct (trust us). It's soft, lightweight, and pre-shrunk, so it's ready for long shifts, dealing with bratty kids demanding samples, or translating secret Russian codes. It’s the perfect attire for looking like you're just scooping ice cream, even when you're saving the world. Again.
Materials: 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain a polyester blend, possibly of Soviet origin).
Fit: A comfortable, flattering fit for sailors, spies, and dads.
This piece of official mall employee gear is created on demand when you clock in for your shift (place your order). This ensures a fresh uniform every time. Wear it with pride. You rule, you suck!
